Sitting in the shell is both an essential part of stuttering (fear of speech that is caused by stuttering), and at the same time, this is the biggest issue we're facing on the way to freedom from stuttering. So it causes stuttering back facilitating it.
The key point is pretty simple: the first step on the way to freedom from stuttering is getting outside the shell. And so it the second and the third and the last step as well. But we don't do it! And there's reason for it.
Let's try to unwind this riddle together.
First off, why am I sharing this? Let me start with just a bit of a back story.
When I graduated from college, and the life finally opened up for me, I found that no road was good for me because I was not ready to face any resistance in my life.
I wanted to become fluent, but the real goal was to be able to express myself to say what I really wanted to say.
Nature granted us with feelings and logic, so when we burn a hand on a hot pan, we instantly recoil and understand that we don't want to touch it again. This generates fear that says "Heads up. Caution." So that next time, we stay safe and just fine.
With stuttering, it all happens in a similar way. Speaking with speech impediments is painful, and we never want to be in that situation going forward. But our stuttering is natural and it’s not our fault.
This is the first massive mistake we are making: sitting in the shell which is avoiding social interaction and hiding from speaking.
We want to speak better, but we don’t want to get outside of the shell.
So we look for a magic pill that can fix our stuttering while sitting in the shell, waiting for some doctor to come and take the pain away.
However, magic pills don't work with real, everyday life settings.
According to Albert Einstein, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. We sit and wait for a solution that leads nowhere and still believe that one day our stuttering will disappear.
Getting outside of the shell, being active and speaking is counterintuitive, but that's what we need to do to improve our speech and establish our self-esteem.
It's crucial that we not only understand the first massive mistake but also feel it.
Let’s be frank. You won’t go far even with the best therapy or using the right technique if you still keep sitting in the shell. Your mindset makes all the difference in keeping you away from fluency.
In my experience, I knew that the method I was taking worked perfectly. I did all the exercises, but I didn't fully commit to getting outside the shell.
It took me some time to realize how critical it was. Once I got it, everything changed.
Sitting in the shell is probably the biggest mistake we're making that keep us away from fluency.
At this point, you might ask “How can we get outside the shell if sitting in the shell is so natural for a person who stutters? We need a strategy for that.”
Exactly. That's what we're going to find in the next couple of videos.
For now, as a practical step and a small assignment on getting outside the shell, please leave a comment below this video. Tell me in the comments have you ever experienced being in the shell? And do you often find yourself there nowadays?
Some other articles and videos you might be interested in:
For more speech exercises click on the image below and get access to my free Improve Program